police life

I’m All About That Face….

Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.  I mean…I can jump off a building; but, I shouldn’t.  I can smoke a cigarette while a tank of oxygen is free-flowing in my nose; but, I shouldn’t.  I can drive 110 mph in my car; but I shouldn’t.   I can eat a whole carton of ice cream; but I shouldn’t.  I can pump my own gasoline; but, I shouldn’t.  (Well, I probably should, but I’m not going to.)  You get the idea.  There are a lot of things I can legally do, things I’m physically capable of doing, and things I like to do that I just flat-out should not do.

I figure this is not going to be my most popular post, but hey–this is my blog and I can say what I want.  (Hmmmm…just because I can…..well, never mind.)  Here goes….

I hate bearded policemen.  Well, I don’t hate the policemen….I hate the beard they all seem to be sporting right now.

I don’t hate all facial hair on officers. I’m good with a uniformed, Tom Selleck-esque  ‘stache.  Matter of fact–I married a mustachioed officer.  The kids on his beat used to call him “Magnum” when he drove up.  When he talks about shaving off his trademark mustache, I die a little inside.  It seems so wrong.  It’s a good look and I like it.  It’s manly.  It’s tough-looking.  It’s strong.  It say’s, “I’m in control.” I would never trash the ‘stache.

But…beards?  In uniforms?  No.  No.  A thousand times no.

Beards belong on lumberjacks.  Beards belong on mountain men.  Beards belong on Duck Dynasty.  Beards belong on Vikings.  Beards belong on Abe Lincoln. Beards belong on beatniks.  Beards belong on dragons.  Beards do not belong on policemen in uniform.

I cannot for the life of me figure out why departments across the country have relaxed their grooming standards and now allow beards.  I’m always taken back a bit when I pull up next to a squad car and give that little side-ways glance to see who is over there and see a fully-bearded officer.  It just ain’t natural.  Trendy?  Yes.  Natural?  No.

Just because you can grow a beard, doesn’t mean you should.  Just because the chief says you can grow a beard, doesn’t mean you should.

Me and Meghan Trainor.  We’re all about that bass …um, I mean, face.

Because you know I’m all about that face
‘Bout that face, no beards
I’m all about that face
‘Bout that face, no beards
I’m all about that face
‘Bout that face, no beards
I’m all about that face
‘Bout that face… Hey!
I’m bringing grooming back.

 

 

 

 

 

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